Goodbye ED

I am 28 years old and ED has been a part of my life for over 10 years. My weight was scary low at one point but I didn't think anything was wrong. It all started in highschool. I lost a few pounds after joining the cross country team. I wasn't trying to, but was the workouts were more intense than anything I had done before.  I liked how I looked and felt after losing a little weight so I took it to the extreme.  I really think that this was the start of it all.

ED has changed form over the years.  There was crazy restrictive ED, workout like a manic ED, eat everything in sight and be sick ED... It really began to control my life.  I would seclude myself and not participate in social events.  I had a plan to stick to and wouldn't want to do anything to mess with that.  There were certain times I had to eat, specific things/ways to eat, I had to be able to workout for 2 hours...It was way out of control.

After many years and ups and downs with ED I had finally had enough! I researched treatment centers and finally picked one.  I quit my job, bought a one way plane ticket, and went to a place called Milestones in Florida.  It was super scary and I had no idea how long I would be gone.  All they told me was anywhere from 1-6 months.  I ended up staying for about 45 days.  Since then things have been better, but I am by no means "cured".  I don't know if I ever will be.  I am learning how to enjoy life again though.  Each meal is still tough, but it gets easier day by day.

I am very lucky to have a supportive husband, family, and friends.  They have stuck by me through thick and thin (literally, ha) I have found some people in the blogger world who have struggled with ED and who are doing wonderfully now.  It is very motivating to read these blogs and know I am not alone and that I can too can overcome this.

13 comments:

  1. Yes. We will always be here for you!

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  2. Your story sounds like mine. I am 28 and have had ED for 10 years too. Thanks for sharing your story.

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    1. Glad you could relate! Well, also not glad because I know what you are struggling with...But it is nice to find other people who understand what dealing with ED is like :)

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  3. Always here for you, how can I not be when you provide SO many yummy recipes <3

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  4. Thank you for your openness about your ed, I didn't realize I have one until recently, everyday is a struggle, but slowly getting better. BTW your recipes are amazing!!

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    1. Thank you! I spent years in secrecy! Recovery is so much easier when you can be open and honest about it! Glad to hear you are getting better! Feel free to message me anytime!

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  5. I hope you're doing well, Kim :) Stay strong and always know you've got your online fit fam right by your side! :D

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    1. Thank you so much! That means a lot!!!

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  6. Love your recipes and your site! I am 27 and have also dealt with ED since I was 16. I'm mostly recovered now (maintained weight for 10 years), but I still have triggering thoughts sometimes like you do. It's nice to find others with whom I can relate and know what it's like :)

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    1. I feel like I will always have some triggering thoughts....they are becoming less and less frequent though!! It is so great finding other people who really truly understand what it is like to struggle with an ED! :)

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  7. It's great to see that you are working hard and succeeding in your recovery. I hope to be in that point of my personal ED recovery in the (hopefully near) future! Thanks for the inspiration and delicious recipes. =)

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